#i need to write more about the vessel au

[krysmcscience]

It’s finally done, guys – five whole pages of Narilamb AU comic AND MORE be upon you! (If you have trouble reading any of the text, view the full-size! These pages are huge!)

Yeesh, this took forever. <:)

There’s probably a ton of inconsistencies and anatomy/perspective wonkeries, but this was mostly just comic practice, so Oh Hekkin Well, Lol <:D

(Yes, I am aware the Gateway’s door isn’t present in the Afterlife, and the actual way in is just a pentagram portal. Yes, I put the door in there anyway because Artistic License, i.e. it felt more impactful for there to be a prison door of sorts to walk through to freedom, rather than just a bland boring portal on the ground. 😠)

anyway, i hate backgrounds so much lmao

Alternate ending and a buttload of bonus art under the cut, followed by goofy AU rambles and headcanon stuff:

I’m calling it the Revival AU. It’s not all that creative a title, and someone else has probably used it already, but I am too lazy to really care, LOL

Alternate ending page, which you will Definitely need to view the full-size for, Whoopsie Daisy:

The alternate ending was actually the first ending I finished things off with, because I had a brief badbrain moment where I forgot the emotional beat I initially wanted the comic to end on, and I tend to write comedy, anyway. I later remembered and drew out the proper ending, but I preserved and finished this one, too, because it still makes me giggle.

They had to go back for the followers off-screen in the AU’s real ending. And by ‘they’ I mean just the Lamb, because they weren’t about to ask three newly freed cats to go back into what used to be their prison. The Lamb DID spend some time watching Narinder and the bois enjoying the outdoors first, though:

In other news, here’s the Lamb and me making fun of my anatomy-drawing ‘skills’:

Meanwhile, if you’re wondering why the Lamb is just a-okay with how things went down vis a vis Their Murder, this bonus comic should answer at least some of your questions:

Ah, yes, also this is how they get engaged outside of the alternate ending. Forgot to mention that bit. XD (I already refuse to believe that Narinder is capable of flirting normally, so why would his initial marriage proposal be any better???)

Oh, and before any of them get a chance to actually head back to the cult grounds, there is one potential problem:

And by ‘problem’ I mean something Narinder intends to ignore for At Minimum a thousand years. Cuz he’s a petty bitch like that. :D

what do you mean i drew the lamb too tall compared to the background? clearly they’re standing on top of baal and aym lmao, why else would you think those two aren’t in this one??? (aym and baal got way too excited about finally being outside, you see, and their silly modes are nothing to sneeze at)

And, speaking of heading back to the cult grounds, I’m sure y’all would love to know how the Lamb’s followers felt about the brand new change in management:

It all went better than expected. <:D Tiny ramble now, feel free to skip down to the next comic.

Before you ask, no, the Lamb does not have any actual powers anymore, other than the immortality Narinder definitely grants them. The Red Crown just thinks it’s funny to suggest otherwise, and Narinder does nothing to discourage this. Also, the Lamb and Narinder aren’t actually married here yet, but, uh. Pretty safe to say that particular ritual directly follows the events of this comic. XD

Given how quickly he mellows out in canon, Narinder probably chills out a lot in this AU once he’s in charge of the cult, too, if only because 1.) He’s finally free, and 2.) He’s equally smitten with and distracted by the Lamb. He’s definitely in charge at least 95% of the time, though, because the Lamb never actually wanted to be a cult leader and, now that their time as a vessel is done, they just want to be a normal(ish) sheep who’s wholly devoted to their hot new divine husband.

Some followers do still have some valid concerns about these two being together, though, which I’m sure at least a few of you might share…

Unfortunately for any such concerns, the Lamb is a bonafide masochist in this AU. :D

They’re also 100% a sub, obviously

Anyone at all: Your relationship is problematic and potentially toxic

The Lamb: fuck yeah it is, it’s so hot~ OuO

Here’s just the last panel, made transparent for whatever nefarious purposes y’all might have for it:

Additional exchange Narinder and the Lamb have at some point, probably after the Lamb does a fatal whoopsie while out on a mission trip or in response to things getting a little too sadistic in the bedroom, ahaha:

Look, there is a very important distinction between life and death, and if you don’t understand that, then you’re probably not worthy of being the God of Death, anyway. (At least, according to Narinder, and ONLY Narinder.)

Last but not least, have these shittens:

~Such creative naming conventions I have utilized, lololol~ :D Anyway, there's a few deets on them in the rambles down below.

The rest is all ramble, so before I get to that, I’ll just say – likes and especially reblogs are very much appreciated!!! :D If you happen to really really REALLY like my stuff, meanwhile, I do have a link in my bio to my ko-fi page, where I’m accepting commissions and donations if you’re especially generous… ÓuÒ

Now, BE FREE IF YOU AIN’T DOWN FOR READING MY GOOFY RAMBLES

First ramble is re: Baal’s question of ‘Did it really work?’, since I didn’t feel like expanding on it in the comic proper, and it’s arguably pretty vague? He doesn’t ask because he doubts Narinder or his capabilities, exactly, but because neither Baal nor Aym have ever actually seen their god at full power before (he’s still technically not at full power here, either). It’s not expressly stated how soon the brothers were brought to Narinder after his imprisonment, but whether it was early on or after a length of time for Shamura to (somewhat) recover from his attack, he must have already been weakened, since I have no doubts that there was a huge battle that accompanied the Bishops working together to trap him. So, between that fight with all four of his siblings, sharing his power with a variety of vessels over time, and being chained immobile for a thousand years, he must have been severely weakened by the time he lent the Red Crown out to the Lamb, which would have only weakened him further.

I like to think this is how the Lamb is able to defeat him if they refuse to be sacrificed, despite how it took all four Bishops working together to subdue and chain Narinder in the first place.

All that aside, the three cats have been trapped in the Afterlife for so long that Baal also wanted verbal reassurance that they are all, indeed, actually able to leave it now – something that I headcanon isn’t possible without a significant amount of power (i.e. the Red Crown’s cooperation with its bearer/vessel).

(On a semi-related note, I don’t headcanon Aym and Baal as twins. I like sweetheart big bro Baal and snarky little goth bro Aym too much to have them be that close in age.)

Ah, teeny thing: If you noticed I switched up the art style for Narinder on the second page, that was intentional. It's sort of a visual indicator that there has been a Big Change for him - that being, how much power he has after sacrificing the Lamb. As for why I changed up his arms in the grass rollin' pic, I don't really subscribe to the notion that his arms are spooky bones because they're horrifically injured (beyond chain-chafing scars, that is), but rather just because he's the Bishop of Death, so he can change how normal-to-spooky they look at will. At some point I might doodle out how I imagine his appearance to range between least to most eldritch... 🤔

Next ramble, regarding Narinder’s feelings towards the Lamb...he was initially too focused on being freed from his imprisonment to form any real attachment to them. They were a tool for his use, first and foremost, but he did notice their intense devotion towards him. It was impossible not to notice, because the Lamb was always very happy to see him, even if it was because they died during a crusade (yet again). He wasn’t originally planning to revive them once he was freed, either, because he saw no real point to it – after all, they were already dead when they first met him, just as any other mortal would be when meeting him in the Afterlife, so death has very little real consequence in his eyes. But, once the chains were off, and it really sank in that he stood to lose the most devoted follower he’s ever had, he decided…why put their soul to rest for good or leave them stuck in the Afterlife when he could just as easily revive them again? And why not reward them for their hard work, anyway? Not only would it cost him nothing by comparison, but the future devotion that could come of it would surely make up for his (bare minimum) effort in reviving them.

He wasn’t expecting to get a full dose of that devotion and a smiling face so soon after killing them, though~ :3c (because the Lamb is a bonafide freak, and not-so-secretly into the fucked up power dynamics going on here, lol)

I should mention here that I am firmly of the belief that any non-god/vessel who crosses through the Gateway and into the Afterlife just straight up dies. So, Aym and Baal? Also straight up dead, from the second Shamura brought them through. Their souls were just never put to rest so that Narinder could have some company – if only according to Shamura. Narinder kept the two around mostly out of bewilderment, because honestly, who are these kittens, and what is Shamura’s game here, anyway??? They never even explained anything, they just tossed these kittens into the Afterlife and LEFT!!! At any rate, Aym and Baal being dead is how I explain why their souls apparently become lost in the void if they’re killed, along with the added complications required to revive the two because of it.

So, with those deets in mind, and given a bit of time, if Narinder hadn’t chosen to revive the Lamb, and also hadn’t chosen to put their soul to rest, they still would have woken up at some point, despite being as straight up dead as Aym and Baal. Who, don’t worry, were also properly revived while Narinder was waiting for the Lamb to wake up. Because I am also firmly of the belief that, first, the dead cannot leave the Afterlife without the use of a ritual/relic (and can't stay in the living world for long regardless), and second, dead followers’ devotion isn’t anywhere near as potent as that of the living, given how much more the living stand to lose.

Final ramble, regarding the Lamb’s feelings towards Narinder, and why they’re so devoted to him…

Well, you don’t spend most of your life on the run with your steadily-dwindling herd, trying to evade the ongoing genocide of your species, without becoming a little fucked up in the head. Maybe a lot fucked up in the head. Life is suffering, so might as well have fun with it, right? Maybe start finding death and pain to be kind of hilarious, even a little bit hot, once everyone you know and love is dead and gone, leaving you all alone? And maybe after that, there’s something comforting in how, despite the cold, cruel uncertainties of life, at least you can always count on the inevitability of death, patiently waiting for you until your very last breath? Who knows. Either way, as soon as the Lamb was killed, and they learned that the literal God of Death was offering them a second chance at life and vengeance via effective immortality, they were 100% ride-or-die-devoted all at once. Turns out death is kinder than life – go figure. (Of course, it helps that Narinder is 100% their type.)

They weren’t put off by Narinder’s thinly-veiled sadism or manipulations, either – they’re not too different in those regards, albeit opting for vastly different methods. It’s a very ‘two sides of the same coin’ sort of deal. In order to stay alive once they were made the last of their kind, the Lamb had no qualms with using others to their advantage, and that did not change once they were revived and expected to run a cult. They didn’t care for the position of authority, though – being a sheep and all, they’re much more of a follower than a leader, and thus greatly appreciated Narinder’s need for control. With how they had to keep on their toes for so long, the Lamb was also pretty good at reading people by the time they died, so they could recognize that a lot of Narinder’s posturing was just that – posturing. Dude’s 95% bluster and only 5% bite. He could obviously be vicious when he wanted or needed to (the Bishops' injuries were clear proof of that), but underneath his outer layer of cruelty was a generous layer of tsundere, and underneath all THAT was a soft squishy middle sibling velcro cat in desperate need of attention and affection.

(Which, for the record, he Did Not feel comfortable getting from Aym and Baal – Narinder still has no idea why the fuck Shamura sent them to him, beyond acting as keepers at best or trying to sabotage his attempts to escape at worst. Which, he thought HE sabotaged in turn, by guiding the kittens into being his devoted disciples instead. He thought he was very clever for it. ‘I outsmarted Shamura!’ he thought, despite that there was never anything there to outsmart. ‘What do you mean, Shamura sent your kittens to me for company?’ he demands of Forneus later. It may or may not lead him to pull Shamura out of Purgatory just so he can shake them and scream about how they should have Fucking Explained that!!!)

But, getting back on track as to why the Lamb was so willing to be sacrificed, I cannot stress this enough – if you pay even a minimal amount of attention to what he’s saying, Narinder is REALLY NOT SUBTLE about his intentions. ‘Death is of little consequence.’ ‘Followers are for you to use to your advantage.’ ‘Sacrifice a follower to absorb more power.’ So, yeah, the Lamb knew exactly what would be expected of them once the other Bishops were dead. They knew Narinder would expect them to die for him one last time. But, after all, death is of little consequence (not to mention hot), so when the time came, they wanted to see him freed, even if it meant oblivion for them in the end.

He’d given them a second life, and the ability to avenge their kin, and they felt indebted to him for that – so, while they were still pretty glum about the possibility that they might not get to see him free of his chains, nothing beyond their devotion and debt to him mattered. They never wanted all the drama and expectations that came with the Red Crown’s power, anyway, so, better for Narinder to have it back so that he could deal with it. What he did with the Lamb afterward would be up to him, and seeing as he was their god, they’d accept his decision gladly.

Were they in love with him by that point? Oh, obsessively so, but only in the devotional sense – romance was nowhere on their mind nor radar. That is, until he unexpectedly revived them again, told them he still needed them, and then offered down his hand to help them up.

The Lamb fell HARD for him in that moment. :3c

And now, a tiny shitten ramble. Lu and Li are twins, because sheep tend to have those a lot, and are conceived not long after the Lamb and Narinder’s marriage ceremony. Lu is the minutes older one, but Li is much more mature. I have put no further thought into these two, other than that they are utter menaces, birthed by the Lamb, cling hard to both their parents but especially Narinder (who spoils them rotten), and they are both genderfluid, using whichever pronouns/names they feel like at any given time. They are also both intersex, same as the Lamb, who was initially infertile up until Something Something Vague Magic, which I have also put no further thought into ¯\_(シ)_/¯

oh, and before anyone tries to suggest i headcanon this AU’s lamb as trending more female due to them giving birth or whatever, no, no, a thousand times no, they might have a vag, but they've also got a dick, and even if it's not as big as they'd like, they still know how to use it

Finally, the very tentative name for the Lamb in this AU is Yazdi, which is really just another name for the Baluchi breed of sheep XD (Not that the Lamb is this specific breed, I just didn’t like any of the other sheep-related names I found, ahaha...)

THAT’S ALL FOR NOW (collapses into an exhausted pile of goopy limbs)

[sizzleissues]

Its May.

Okay so this is in the same AU I had last year its just changed and evolved while also being the exact same. Except now I have 15,000 words of it written, like 7,000 words of planning and lore and hours upon hours of research that I will be pointedly ignoring. Will be posting more stuff this month about the AU and my hopes and dreams for it

Also slight art improvement check? I’ll put their original mermaid designs below the cut.

It’s Marinette as a mermaid and … its not Adrien or Chat Noir but a third worse thing (Catwalker but in the purest manifestation of it being a curse and not who he wants to be) I will be making designs for mer!Ladybug, and mer!Adrien as its own thing later on.

Okay if you want to indulge me look below the cut

Old mermaid designs first. I am going to be talking about my design thoughts, thoughts and ramblings about this AU and what I’ve been up to. You have been warned

As you can see, some things have changed but neither design I hated, I just wanted to go further with it.

My brain is quite specific about mermaids and how I want them to generally look. I wanted to distinguish biological merfolk from transformed humans by having them being anatomically different. So Adrien has a vertical tail instead which is also way faster underwater. His transformation is quite distressing for him and very chaotic. Of course when he accepts it he’s not so raggedy.

Marinette similarly avoids her life as a mermaid by becoming human and I wanted her mermaid design to hint toward her fascination with humans. She wears a top she fashioned from human fabric she found in a sunken merchant vessel. In general all other merfolk either forgo clothes or wear things fashioned from materials available to them. There’s deep fear of humans and human things so even though human clothes are available to them (off dead bodies but…. Whatever) they choose to difference themselves as much as possible. The same taboos don’t exist for them and their bodies are already adapted from the temperature of their environment. Adrien has stray bits of netting and seaweed on him because he’s not exactly the best at controlling his speed and often crash’s through fishing nets and patches of seaweed resulting in stuff being caught on him.

A lot of their designs are still being worked but I’ve definitely pushed them the right direction!

On to the AU. You might have seem me cryptically talk about something I’m writing the past few weeks. This is because it’s been in my brain since last May and been on and off writing it since then. I decided I’d talk about it once May came back around but and then when I finished writing it, start posting sneak peaks and more spoilery art until it was fully edited and I felt confident in it to post with an aim for it to finish posting once May rolled around again. Oh god.

It’s set in the late 1700s in a fictional version of France that’s actually fragmented over a bunch of islands. I have done more fashion research than I ever thought I’d do and in the end we will still be taking creative license but know I do know what they actually wore! I ALSO did a butt tonne of research about sailing ships and turns out they are super complicated and now I know too much and yet too little still about them. It should be super fun and action packed if I can manage. Have some really good scenes already in my head I know you’ll love. We’re already three ships battle deep and I’ve only written four chapters. (It chills out for a bit after that)

This is entirely self-indulgent by the way. I’m writing this for me, you guys are just a bonus. I literally don’t care as long as it satiates my rabid need for the fic that only lives in my brain at the moment. Saying that, I do want to put my best foot forward.

The next thing I will be posting for this is their human forms and more blabblerings about that. For I am insane and all.

[sherbertquake56]

okay I’m dropping some of my fable arcane au thoughts before the new episodes drop tomorrow even tho most of it is based on season 1 anyway—

so some basic taggings for you that I based the AU around:

1. Icarus as Jinx.

powder vs jinx is just the sherbert vs icarus name thing. toxic father. unhealthy relationship with sibling. a lil crazy and maybe evil. thinks that they are at fault for the things around them. lil bombs? nah- little SPLASH potions. hearing and seeing mylo and claggor? it’s Haley- it’s literally Haley—

2. Fable as Silco.

okay fable’s design WAS partially inspired by silco— they literally look the same— they’re both a man with two priorities: take over and make his own nation & care for child.

you know the ending scene of season 1? where they’re sitting at the table? THAT. With Jinx assuming that he’s gonna give her up to topside and him getting the first chance to talk and saying “her name is JINX!” i could write an essay on that for icarus. they’re so toxic and it’s so perfect. also that scene at the start of s2 ep2? YEAH THAT—

3. Centross as Ekko

This one is controversial and up to debate but i will die on this hill— SO THE S1 BRIDGE FIGHT. I am so willing to put aside any possible prison duo gay-ness in this AU for that rivalry/fight. they were friends!!! they were so good!! and now they wanna KILL EACH OTHER!! it’s great.

It’s also specifically thinking of Ekko’s tree home as solstice— older Ekko very much has the vibe of Violet specifically-

4. Arisanna as Sevika

I DONT KNOW WHY BUT IT MAKES SENSE TO ME. It’s specifically vexed Ari during the coworkers era but idk it just feels right— I look at her relationship with Silco and Jinx and go ‘hmmm this could be something’

[I will also say there is an argument here for swapping Centross and Ari tho— big tree city as Ari rebuilding the records goes hard, and angsty fighty toxic with jinx centross is also good— it’s like 50/50 for me]

5. Isla as Vander

LET ISLA BE A BADASS IN THIS AU. SHE DESERVES IT— something something raising vi and powder alone, something something the backstory with silco— there’s something there and it hits really hard in scenes where vi sees vander and helps her get back up— also I look at jinx and vander and I go “mmmm this is in fact how icarus sees Isla”

6. Rae as Vi

This was obvious given the above but LISTEN— in this ALTERNATE UNIVERSE OF EVENTS I think it would be fun- do I think that vi perfectly fits canon rae? no. But in this world it would KICK ASS. rae deserves to beat some people up— got kicked out of the overworld (zaun) by fable (silco) and had to go to the end (piltover) to get away from him?? rae end prince aus are already here so why not end rae also punching people huh??? also. gay people.

———

Okay— here’s where I need some help, thoughts, and opinions from you all…

1. Caitlyn.

POLYAMORY IS HARD TO TAG AND I DONT KNOW WHO FITS BEST?? For me, season 1 Caitlyn fits best as Caspian, but season 2 Caitlyn is more for Fenris— so I’m very stuck. yes absolutely give thoughts on this please—

2. Viktor as Aax (but how does that work)

Viktor absolutely should be Aax— mr. Scientist / lab experiment / turned religious figure vessel for god is CORRECT. But honestly the rest of Piltover gang is really hard with Rae as Vi— Jayce/Viktor/Mel is yelling at me to be the polycule but aGH— ya know??? very stuck on this so I instead look at the coworkers and go “mm good yes—”

Random other tags I think also make sense:

- Ulysses as that Telchin looking mf Stev— mans took out one lil medical device as his fish self and I said YUP

- The hexcore big orb thing underground as Quixis— big white glitch orb room make things go wack. couldn’t be easier than that.

———

Anyways that’s all— I’ve been rotating this in my mind for like a week and have had way too many thoughts about it thank you for your time—

[heilos]

Living Harmony AU relevant character sheets/info: Harmony aka the "Tree of Harmony" Shadow Lock Somnambula Starswirl the Bearded Stygian might be my favorite of the Pillars of Equestria and it's always made me sad that he wasn't used more in the show. So I decided to team up with my new friend Orin who's taken the time to make a bunch of amazing Pillar redesigns (same person I made this Starswirl animation rig for as a gift) that i'll be incorporating into my future animation project. The Pillars are very important characters to Harmony's story so I wanna do them justice. Listed below is some context for these sketches provided by my friend Orin and some written bits from myself. This is a Stygian who's been separated from the Pony of Shadows for some time, but is now dealing with the consequences of dark magic. I've had so much fun throwing ideas back and forth for this AU and I can't wait to share more in the near future.

Unicorn from a small sea side village in ancient times

Dedicated scholar and battle strategist

Special talent is writing. An incredible wordsmith in his own right

Wrote a very popular autobiography about his time possessed by the Pony of Shadows called “Me and My Shadow” (his third novel)

Name means "dark and gloomy" and also relates to the river and deity "Styx" of Greek mythology

Brought the Pillars of Equestria together in a bid to save his home town from the Sirens (the Dazzlings)

Wanted to become a hero in his own right even though he tried to convince himself otherwise

Lacks the physical strength and magical prowess of his fellow Pillars. Compared to any other run of the mill unicorn, however, Stygian is actually decently above average in terms of magical ability, though he downplays himself significantly

Ousted from the group after a misunderstanding involving him taking the other pillar’s relics to make copies of them so he too could be a hero and join them as an equal. His friends thought he was out to steal their power instead

Becomes bitter and seeks revenge afterwards when discovering the Well of Shade, which leads to the Pony of Shadows claiming him as its vessel

Banished along with the pillars to “limbo” for 1000 years through a powerful spell conceived by Starswirl and planned out by the rest of the pillars

Is freed from the Pony of Shadows' influence in modern Equestria thanks to the Mane 6 and the pillars with Twilight and Starlight being the main catalyst in helping Stygian where Starswirl had failed before

While no longer claimed by the Pony of Shadows, the consequences of using such powerful dark magic as well as being possessed by a being of pure shadow left its mark on him

Has dark magic scarring visible on his body. His eyes, inner mouth, teeth and magic color are permanently altered in appearance. It gives him a rather unsettling aura, much to his displeasure

The Pony of Shadows mark is not so easily purged, even with the combined strength of the past and present Elements of Harmony. A fragment of the shadow lives on in Stygian, inextricably bound to him, but small enough that it can no longer influence him.

Has abilities superficially similar to King Sombra's, albeit on a much smaller scale, and needs extensive practice before he can comfortably wield this new strength.

Luna becomes Stygian's second mentor, after Starswirl, to help him gain control over his new abilities. Her direct experience using dark magic to become Nightmare Moon makes her an effective teacher

As Stygian exerts better control over the shadow fragment, he eventually gains the ability to "Shadow Walk" or travel between shadows. This temporary form makes him look eerily similar to the Pony of Shadows. Pretty spooky

Can tell when the Pony of Shadows is close in proximity due to the shadow fragment, like a magic tracker

Stygian is a lucid dreamer. He appreciates dreams a lot more now that he’s sleeping on a proper schedule. Once in a while he’ll meet up with Princess Luna in the dream realm when they can’t find spare time in the waking world, outside of mentoring sessions, to enjoy each other's company as friends

Stygian redesign by Orin331

[risuola]

Please hear me out!

i’ve been thinking about this for a while, and I wanted to write it myself but I can’t write for shit 😭 Here’s my idea, reader (she/her) is close friends with Satoru and Suguru. She takes Suguru’s place instead, and Suguru ends up not going insane, and decides to stick around in Jujutsu High. But because the reader takes his place in this story, she spirals and abandons the idea of being morally good. (She’s a sensitive softie at heart 🥹 the cruel reality of being a sorcerer really took a toll on her). She commits so many crimes that the higher ups urge the strongest duo to finally execute her after dismissing her for nearly a decade. She dies in their hands, and doesn’t get a proper burial. Kenjaku takes her body and uses it as vessel. When Shibuya arc finally unfolds, she shows up right in front of Satoru and Suguru, alive and well. Soon reveals that it’s Kenjaku who has full control of her body. Of course their guilts eats them alive, and the reader (more like kenjaku) rubs salt on their wounds by taunting them about how she’s a great vessel and also a waste that she had to die so soon.

LOST CAUSE — F. READER x GOJO SATORU + GETO SUGURU, but there’s no romance whatsoever, guest appearance of Kenjaku

cw: an au where SatoSugu have another close friend; spoilers for Hidden Inventory/Premature Death arc and the very beginning of Shibuya arc, so much angst and the usual that comes with JJK – blood, hurt, tears and depression : D also, possibly inaccurate references to the original plot, reader's death — 5,5k words

a/n: I’m hearing you out dear! Thank you for the conception, it certainly fulfilled my need to write long and angsty &lt;3

It was stupid. All of it was stupid. Why? Which decisions led you to where you now stood, all of your mind and body filled with devastation as you stilled in time – above the piles of little corpses, disfigured and permanently contorted in a grimace of dread and suffering. A stench of blood and burned bodies irritated your nostrils, your eyes were teary from all the smoke that still was filling the air and as you looked down at your hands, they were covered in blood and purple goo. Sticky. Repulsive. And the screams. In the dead silence of your surroundings, your head was still filled with an echo of those, who were now dead at your feet. Those, who you were unable to save. The imagery of them running, begging, dying carved itself into your mind. Why were you here, again?

* * *

“Hey, y/n, you’ve lost some weight. Are you alright?”, Satoru asked, playing with pencil that just a moment ago he asked you to throw at him. A showcase of his new skills, the techniques he’s been perfecting for the last year after encountering Toji Fushiguro. You forced a smile, squinting from the blinding sun of the summer at its peak.

“Yeah, sure,” you replied, patting Suguru’s shoulder, because his attentive eyes were scanning you already for any sign of disorder; you could hear his analytic brain cranking up, his golden pupils drilling holes in your head. “I’m good, it’s just too hot you know?”

“Wanna go grab some ice cream later?”

“Always.” No, you didn’t wanna go grab ice cream with them. You didn’t wanna grab anything with anyone for that matter and already you had come up with some half-baked excuse to sell later to your two best friends.

You, Shoko, Gojo and Geto were all in the same year in Jujutsu high. You joined them a little late, but quickly found yourself inside the love triangle with the two boys. You called it love, but it truly was nothing more than just a bonding friendship that you wished will last forever; a really close one and you couldn’t imagine your world without their chaos. They were like brothers to you, the ones you’ve never had and Ieiri was like a sister, but she was smart enough to keep her distance from the mess of SatoSugu. You were not as bright in that matter, but for two years, you couldn’t appreciate enough the yin and yang that they created, the casual bickers and deep talks late at night, the cuddles and pinches, the pats and smacks, the tears and laughs, sleepovers, sleepless nights and everything between. You loved them, you couldn’t think of your future without them.

That’s until not that long ago. Few months, maybe. You felt like you’ve been spiraling slowly into something that could only be named depression, because if not that, then what else? Why would you randomly tear up nowadays, zoning out completely in the midst of sentences. Why would you spend nights, blankly staring at the ceiling instead of sleeping, isolating yourself from your friends more and more? And why would you still hear that? The screams, the pleads of hysteric, the soul-tearing sounds of pain and frighten that you’ve been carrying inside your brain since that one mission.

Everything went wrong then, and you were alone. Shoko stayed at the campus, working her way towards becoming a doctor and you, Satoru and Suguru were assigned only to solo missions since the plasma vessel failure. You were strong, it was stated that your year was exceptional, that all of you have a chance to become special grades soon, but you hated that. Being strong came with a burden that you were not ready to take, and when you realized that, most of it was already heaving on your shoulders.

When you got to that school, it was already too late and it wasn’t your fault. You rushed there as soon as you were assigned with the job, but when you dropped the curtain and looked at the building, there was already smoke coming from the window holes, that some time earlier had glass in them. And when you kicked your way inside the little indoor sports arena, the view struck you in ways you couldn’t possibly prepare yourself for and certainly, you couldn’t process it as well. The school was primary, those people were just kids, but the curses pay no mind to age of their victims. This one was particularly playful – or rather, eagerly violent – spreading hellfire around, burning these children alive one by one, causing chaos, suffering and bloodshed. When you finished exorcising it, it was over. For the curse, for your job and for the lives of all of those children. None survived. Not even one.

Not always we can save everyone, Suguru always told you, rationalizing the sacrifices sorcerers have to make and you tried to repeat that in your head when you got out. You tried to play it over the screams, but eventually, the soft tone of your friend’s voice got lost in the catastrophic cacophony of sorrow, sizzling skin and burning death. And that, maybe wouldn’t be enough for you to lose your mind. Maybe you could recover from that, but soon after the incident you witnessed the group of people that stood behind the assault. A band of grown humans, men and women, who were convinced some of those children were possessed by devils or some other shit, so in all hypocrisy known to race, they hired a curse user to fight fire with fire. Quite literally. Those people were so blinded by their fear of unknown that they sacrificed lives of dozens of little children, they shattered so many innocent lives only because they believed in something absurd. And then, they tried to push the blame on you, on sorcerers despite the fact they hired one to do the dirty job. And then, they killed the user, fearing him too. When you’ve got to see the body of a sorcerer that you’ve never got to meet, or at least you thought so, you realized that probably, you wouldn’t recognize him anyway. You’ve seen corpses barely reminiscing of humans, twisted and broken as curses often chose the most petrifying, violent ways of killing, but this? This was something you’ve never seen before – a cruel, ruthless exhibition of pure hate, evidence of deliberate torture, the picture painted in stabs, burns and bruises. All of which, caused by people, who frankly, showed no remorse nor regret as their faces were painted in pride, origin of which you failed to notice.

Those humans. Used jujutsu to commit mass murder only to blame it on your people and kill them. Animals. No. Worse. Much worse.

“Y/n, please, let’s talk it through,” Suguru tried to reason, as you stood up against the two of your friends, in the middle of Shibuya’s scramble crossing. People were passing next to the three of you, unbothered by the way your worlds were colliding right here, in the busiest part of Tokyo. People didn’t care of others, they wouldn’t react if someone next to them would get stabbed to death, only caring about their own shoes to not get them stained in the dirt of blood.

“Don’t be stupid, it’s not who you are,” Satoru raised his tone, but all you felt was nothing. The emotions you’ve seen on his face were real, you knew it. Satoru wears his heart on his shoulder, he pours everything he feels into the words he aims at people that are close to his soul, and you were no exception, but at this moment, you felt nothing. “I know you couldn’t do that.”

“Couldn’t I?”, you asked, thinking back on the last Friday, during which you executed those same people that used jujutsu sorcerers to wipe the floors of that primary school. To wipe the blood and burned bodies. You remember how they knelt before you, how the women cried begging for their lives, yelping that they have children, families and yet, those same children and families were nowhere in their mind when they ordered a mass murder in the primary school. “And why would that be exactly? Because you two think so?”

“Y/n, I get it,” Geto stepped forward, but stopped as you glanced at him. “I really do. You know me, we talked about it. It was hard for me too after Riko, I know what you’re going through.”

“I know Suguru.”

“I thought you keep his side, y/n,” Gojo threw his hands in the air, helplessly trying to find the words to dress his mind with. “I thought you believe in doing good with your powers. That people won’t understand so we shouldn’t look at them and just do what we do. Wasn’t that what you’ve told me?”

“I did, yes,” you gave it a nod and exhaled. “But it changed. Yes, they won’t understand. Anything that they can’t comprehend is pure evil for them and yet they believe in such absurd like gods. They will use us to do their dirty works and then blame us for it, because they cannot understand a single thing. And then, they will kill us, one by one and we, the strongest, cannot do nothing about it. We’ll have to go through life through the corpses of our friends. People don’t deserve what we do for them.”

“Y/n, please, let’s talk about it. Let’s get back to school-“ Geto tried, but you cut him off.

“You two, get back to school. I know I have a sentence already, there’s no point for me to get back there only to get executed. And frankly, I don’t want to get back there, to take part in what they teach us is right when we die for those people. We give our lives for them and they have no idea,” you said, taking a step back. You could tell the lights will soon switch. “Look around, Satoru, Suguru. They crawl around us unaware of our sacrifice and yet, even if they are so fragile a single blow can kill them, they think we deserve to be killed. I’m not gonna take part in this anymore. I’m sorry.”

“We can’t let you go, you know that, we-“

“Then attack me. I’m sure any of you can take me down. I’d rather die by your hands, than on a job of protecting them.”

You turned your back on them, and Satoru raised his hand, pointing at your silhouette, blue already on his mind as his cursed energy gathered in front of his fingers. Suguru’s curses sprawled out of their dimension, but none of them pursued with the attack, unable to do that. They couldn’t kill you. You were too dear to them. They loved you too much to take your life like this. So they let you go, and soon enough, they lost the sight of you in the crowd.

* * *

Nine years. It's been almost a decade and many things changed. You changed your ways completely, making a point of protecting sorcerers from people, even if that meant killing them, but care for humans was something you’ve lost many years ago, having it slowly replaced by disgust. Your once soft heart turned hard and dark and all the good in you vanished as you time after time solidified your beliefs that humans are simply not worth saving, therefore there was no need to keep them alive the moment they became useless. Over those years, you used those people to your benefit, raising money and gathering intel and then, the second their use to you has become nonexistent, so were them. Blood burned permanent stains on your hands but screams of hurt didn’t phase you at all. Have you become a monster? You might have. But for the lives of sorcerers, it was worth it.

It’s been almost a decade since you’ve been dismissed from jujutsu community for crimes, that over those years piled up rapidly and during this time, both Satoru and Suguru tried to stay out of this, whilst Yaga turned a blind eye to the corrupted path one of his students went down by. The now principal felt responsible for not doing enough, for not saying enough, for not noticing soon enough and though the rest of his students, now teachers in Jujutsu high told him that some things were inevitable, it wasn’t that easy to switch off the thinking. Same went for both the strongest, but for years, they waited in hopes for something to change.

That was until you killed someone seemingly important. A politician of sorts, high government pawn that you learned was funding a unit of so-called sorcerer killers, ones that modelled after Toji Fushiguro in cold blood were meant to take down a menace that jujutsu users were, as if it was them who were the ones to fear. Opposite to little no-one’s deaths, this one was loud, this one was medial and this one, Yaga couldn’t let slip. So, an order was given.

Kill on sight.

Almost ten years, and yet Satoru still couldn’t believe what happened. Whilst young, the three of you were almost inseparable and you, out of the whole group, were the most sensitive person he knew. You were soft and full of smiles, kind above all else and yet, you were strong enough to hold back the tears he knew were threatening to roll down your cheeks on many occasions. You were soothing, an oasis that was easily able to turn any darkness into light, and what Satoru couldn’t forgive himself was that once that same darkness started devouring you, he didn’t notice. Too focused on his own missions, on lighthearted shenanigans, on perfecting his usage of limitless and six eyes, he had no idea about your state of mind and when he realized, you have already been sentenced. Suguru didn’t notice either. Or maybe didn’t want to notice, because you talked through many nights about the doubts you both had. He knew about the utter devastation that was slowly consuming your soul but hoped you’ll overcome it, because you always were a sunshine, and a sunshine couldn’t die down to shadows. Turned out, this shadow was pitch black and no light made its way through it.

“Y/n,” they called you and the beautiful music that their voices created brought back memories of your youth. Ten years, almost, had passed since you’ve seen your best friends the last time, and with curiosity sparkling through your system, you turned to face them.

“Satoru, Suguru,” addressing them, your lips curved up slightly in a manner of soft joy. Your heart fluttered at the sight; your pulse raised just as it would for person who’s just seen the love of their life. “Long time no see.”

“It’s not as pleasurable as we would like it to be, y/n,” Suguru sighed and you took a moment to absorb the view.

Both of them changed. Suguru, still tall and broad, seemingly even buffier than he was before stood there with his hair now longer and partially knotted and partially left loose on his back. His facial features sharpened, jaw got more edge to it, eyes turned more narrow and focused, but still, some softness remained from what you remembered and probably he would seem even more familiar if not for the tough expression he had going on. Satoru, right next to him, became even taller. His white hair was now pointing up, kept by a white wrap that completely covered his eyes – something that he probably adapted during the time of usage of his six eyes. Not much of his face you could see, but with ease you noticed his features matured. Both were dressed in uniforms that you could only tie to their unbreakable bond with Jujutsu high.

“You’re now teachers, the two of you, huh?”, you asked, smiling softly, but keeping their moves in mind. “I’ve heard this year’s students are exceptional, now it makes sense. Good they have such amazing senseis.”

“You could have been one of the teachers too,” Gojo snapped.

“How could I teach anyone something I don’t believe in?” a chuckle rumbled deep in your chest as you thought of the image. Abstraction of it made you amused. “How’s Shoko? Is she a doctor now?

“She is,” Geto muttered, unsure why is he answering your questions. “Yaga is the principal.”

“Oh, is he? Look at him, climbing up that ladder,” you laughed, “so, it’s on his orders that you two are here?”

“You killed a fucking politician, y/n,” Satoru spoke, sounding calm but you could tell his blood was boiling. Both of his hands hidden in his pockets were visibly clenched in fists and even though you couldn’t see his eyes, you knew his brows were furrowed. “Almost a decade we allowed you to do whatever you tried to do, but this time, higher ups stepped in. The sentence is decided, we cannot let you pursue your goals further.”

“And why are you both here? I’m sure just one amazing special grade would be enough,” there was a certain amount of poison in your words, though it wasn’t directed at your friends and both of them knew it. “Are the higher ups so desperate to get me off the board because it’s them who give green lights to those assholes that kill us? Did you know that that pathetic politician I’ve killed was in midst of creating an army of little Toji Fushiguros? How do you think he even knew about the dude, huh?”

“An army of Toji?”

“Yeah, remember that guy, that cut both of you into slices? Yea, that one. And who’s giving away the cursed tools to said army? Well, it’s not me and I assume not any of you as well.”

 “Y/n,” Suguru made his way to the side in what seemed like an attempt on surrounding you, because in that same moment, Satoru began shifting to the other side. “I agree with you. People don’t deserve what we do. But no one else can do it. You’re killing those whom we swore to protect.”

“Tell me, Suguru… how many bodies of our friends did Shoko cut open?” you asked and the question made the dark-haired man tsk. It was the truth that hurt the most, he hated how precisely it hit the spot. “How many of our allies were spread across her metal table after Haibara was there? Well, half of Haibara?”

“That’s not the point,” Satoru scoffed and with an exhale, he raised his hand up to loosen up the bandages around his eyes. “We die just as people die. Sorcerers are not above death. You know that, right?”

“We’re not above that, but we are above people and we risk our lives, which we just like them have only one of, for them. And they fuckingstep on it. If I have to pick who’s gonna die from a curse, why would I pick a sorcerer, when a loss of a mere human will be much less tangible than the loss of one of us?”

“Because they cannot protect themselves from curses, and we can.” Geto replied and in a whiff, you felt the appearance of his curses around him. Both him and Gojo were getting ready for a fight, so you had to get ready as well.

“But can we really protect ourselves from them?”, you glared back at him; your tone calm but laced with icicles that pierced through Suguru’s mind as he struggled to see you inside of you.

All of the softness he had always equated you with dissolved into something he couldn’t quite place. Image of you killing someone just for the sake of killing somehow couldn’t materialize inside his mind and it pained him, breaking his heart to think that he will be the reason of your death. And it’s true that probably, just one of them would be enough for that fight, but there was no way they would be able to chose and no one else could do it. You were the strongest, you grew into a special grade quickly after leaving and your technique proved to have no flaws or holes. You were a threat above abilities of others, stepping down only to the two of your friends, if not being equal to them.

“Let’s do it quickly, Suguru,” Satoru sighed, tucking his wraps into one of his pockets.

“Oh, where’s your playful attitude, Satoru?”, you teased, but somehow it hurt you as well. It was your friend you were talking to. Both of them, that came here to kill you and only way for you to get out of it was to kill them.

And killing them, turned out, you couldn’t do. Even hurting them came with difficulty not physically, but mentally. But you fought them both at the same time, keeping a defensive stance, searching for an opening to vanish. From them, you wished to run away, to not make them take the burden of your death because you could see it in their eyes, you were just as dear to them still, as they were to you. But they left you no opening to run away, so you fought. Using everything you’ve got to immobilize them, because instead of taking their lives, that would give you more time.

The way you stood against them, with your cursed technique of energy manipulation, it gave them the hardest time since Toji, and considering they were both taking part in the fight now, ten years after and significantly stronger, just showed how much work you’ve put into your own development. And with pride you noticed, how strong both of your friends became as well. You countered all of their attacks, slashed away the curses and blocked the blues and reds, albeit it really was a matter of time and you knew that. And so, you pushed through, materializing in your hands weapons made from pure, solidified cursed energy, using swords and needles and creating armor around your body that effectively, shielded you from any attack. Your weapon was different from cursed tools. It was made only from energy, strong and unbendable, changing shapes and forms as you deemed it necessary, allowing you to use it in close combat and on long distances. Any curses Suguru summoned stood no chance against what you wielded, but the sheer amount of them was just short of overwhelming you. On top of that, Satoru’s constant offensive, his fists saturated in limitless abilities, the sheer strength of both bodies that were attacking you, slowly rendered you weaker. And it didn’t surprise you.

The end has come when one of the curses stopped you mid-way, engaging in a fight that distracted you enough for a hollow purple to reach your body. The blast threw you away as your body pierced through three buildings straight, through thick concrete bocks and hard steel reinforcements like it was tearing through wet paper and it’s only thanks to the full body coverage of your cursed technique, that it didn’t kill you on the spot. But it hurt. All of your body felt broken once you finally stopped, back pressed against the wall that still cracked underneath the impact of your frame hitting it. Blood covered your vision and a cough shook your body with painful wave overtaking your entire nervous system.

“So that’s the infamous hollow purple, huh?”, you muttered, leaning your head back against the cold solid behind you. There wasn’t much in your body that wouldn’t be fractured at least, you could tell without a mistake that your heart was still beating only because of the cursed energy that still circled throughout your frame.

Both men appeared in front of you, jumping from above – Suguru coming from one of his flying curses and Satoru, probably just teleported here.

“I’m sorry, y/n,” Gojo whispered, squatting in front of you and Geto followed his motion to level his vision with yours.

“’ts alright, ‘toru,” you muttered, feeling the dizziness taking the best of you. After the hit you took, you were certain not even a genius like Shoko could save you. “Sugu… both so strong.”

Exchanging a quick glance, both sorcerers sat down, on your sides, paying no mind to the puddle of blood underneath you. They took your hands, so small in comparison to theirs, now red and wounded severely, but the pain you couldn’t feel much of anymore.

“I’m sorry I didn’t take this mission for you. Back in our days. It was meant to be mine, but I was training,” Satoru confessed, squeezing lightly the fractured bones in your palm, reminiscing of the day that was the beginning of your end. The elementary. That day engraved itself in his memory as one of many days that seemingly mattered nothing. Yaga told him about the issue, the curse and fire in school for the youngest, but he brushed it off, focusing all of his mind on perfecting the last touches of his technique. He still remembers how sensei was mumbling profanities, but couldn’t care less because he was that close from teleporting.

“’ts okay, ‘toru.”

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there either,” Suguru added, his voice barely a whisper as you leaned your head against his shoulder, desperate to ease the heaviness. What Geto remembered from the day in question was that he had an issue with his own technique. Little difficulty, as he was absorbing one of the special grade curses he just caught. It wasn’t severe, it wasn’t even that important, he could have fix this on another time and take the god damn mission, but instead, he declined. “I thought if I don’t take the job, Satoru will, but turned out, it got to you.”

“Sugu, ‘ts ok.”

“Remember how we used to sneak out the dorms to get ice cream in the middle of the night?”, Satoru changed the topic completely – a defensive mechanism to lighten up the mood, to prevent him from crying. And you hummed in response, lowering your heavy lids.

“And how Satoru got drunk after three sips of a beer? That’s when we all knew he’s the lightest head in the history,” Suguru added and faded images of how Gojo discovered that he cannot drink to save his life rushed to the front of your mind.

You had no idea how long it took, was it few minutes or merely few seconds, but you listened to both men rambling above your head, reminiscing of your school days and everything that you did together. Of every prank you witnessed that they took on poor first years, of every little mischief and menace they performed, following Satoru’s lead, because it’s always him who stood tall in the name of chaos. You were humming softer and softer, quieter and quieter.

Until you were not.

“And then we put those cupcakes in Nanami’s bed and-“

“Satoru,” Geto cut him softly, looking down at your stilled frame. At your frozen chest and softened features, sensing no more heartbeat. And Gojo turned his eyes towards you as well, taking in the last picture of you, who he loved as his little sister, even though there was no age gap between you and him. And then they both cried in silence, spending another hour with your dead body before gathering you and taking home.

* * *

October 31, 2018

21:18

Only word that could describe what was happening in Shibuya at this moment would be chaos. Pure disorder, people frightened and running, some unconscious on the ground and some other hiding from what was happening in the Shibuya station. Most of them couldn’t see it but felt the terror, saw the blood, smelled the death in the middle of which, two men were standing.

Both Satoru and Suguru, when they came down here to fight whatever the hell was attacking people, couldn’t move; their heads void of any logical thoughts as memories rushed to the fronts of their minds. Stunned to the core and frozen, they looked into the eyes of the person in front of them, distrusting their own vision. The person that wore the familiar look of you, the energy of you and what seemed like – the same cursed technique, and voice, and face, and hair, and everything. Not one thing betrayed trickery or deception as there you stood, facing them both with a smile on your face – one of those soft ones that had melted their hearts on the spot a decade before. Your features relaxed, genuine, borderline joyous as you breathed the air around them once again.

“What…?”, Suguru snapped first, forcing his own body to move and smacking his friend’s shoulder. “How?”

“Who the hell are you…?”, Satoru whispered, voice stuck in his throat as all of the information that his senses were receiving contradicted with what his soul was telling him.

“Aah? It’s been few months, but do you not recognize me anymore?”, your voice flew through your mouth, the very same gentle and bright tone they used to fall asleep to. “It’s hurting my feelings.”

“Cut it,” Gojo snapped, now putting more pressure on his vocal cords, a groan escaping his throat in effect. “Cut the bullshit, you’re not her. You cannot be her. Y/n is-“

“Dead? Yeah, that purple really messed me up,” you chuckled, shrugging your shoulders slightly and stepping forward. “I have to admit, restoring the body wasn’t the easiest of all.”

“Reveal yourself,” Geto took the defensive stance, ready to pursue with attack if needed and his curses floating behind him on standby. “You’re not fooling us.”

“Ah, how stubborn,” another laugh brightened your face, only now more menacing, more teasing as your dainty fingers reached up to gather the lose hair out of your forehead, revealing a line of thin stitches across your skin there. “See, you really did me a favor by burying her body oh-so traditionally. Isn’t that the procedure to burn every deceased sorcerer?” your mouth was moving, spilling the words interlaced with taunt as the, what looked like, thread was pulled out of the horizontal line above your eyebrows and soon after, grabbed by the hair, the top of your head was lifted, revealing the terrifying image of a brain. With mouth of its own.

“What did you do to her?!”

“Oh, I just took what you two threw away,” you replied, slowly putting the upper skull part down on its place, matching the lines as the thread went through the holes by itself, securing the head together. “And I have to thank you for your little sentiment. If not for that, I wouldn’t have my perfect vessel. Ah, but it’s sad, isn’t it? Such a young, pretty girl had to die so early, and more so, killed by her own best friends. What a waste to jujutsu community, don’t you think?”

Both the boys stood there in shock, guilt eating them alive as the salt and acid was being rubbed into the wounds that just opened. The scabs of the past were ripped away, revealing the gushing pain and Satoru growled in anger, realizing that once again, he might have been responsible for what happened to you. This time, Suguru kept up with him in terms of fury, feeling his own blood boiling in his veins, unable to watch your body being possessed like this, used like a toy.

“Y/n, I know you’re there-“ Gojo called, but got stopped quickly by another pilfering laugh.

“Oh, but she’s not. Her soul is long gone and dead. You made sure to have her soul dead, and you have to know I nearly teared up reviewing her memories when I took the body. Such a poignant story, oh, so heartbreaking.” The teasing had no end as more and more poisonous venom spilled through your mouth, contradicting the carefree and joyful tone of your voice.

“What makes you believe that even if you take her body, you can win here? We’ve defeated her already,” Suguru narrowed his eyes.

“Oh, you’ve won but that’s because she let you two won. Wasn’t that surprising how easily you finished her? A special grade? How she didn’t even try to dodge the hollow purple, like the little curse that she was fighting with was really that much of a struggle? Oh, don’t be silly, you two. It wouldn’t be that easy if she tried.”

“We won’t let you-“

“You must understand your situation. What you’re standing in is a special grade cursed object. A prison realm, and to say it simply, you’ve already lost,” you pointed at the floor, from where the four corners of a cube stretched into a mass of flesh, with an eye – giant and bleeding, staring at its target, as the next stage of sealing began before either of sorcerers reacted. “And what’s more interesting, the prison realm can seal only one person at the time, but with the incredible technique of my current host, I was able to fuel its capacity to two occupants, by manipulating the cursed energy it used. Marvelous!”

The cursed object began enveloping both men, rendering them helpless and immobile, as their cursed energy became unavailable for their use.

“We’ll save you, y/n, you hear me?”, Satoru yelled in unison with his friend and the lone tear rolled down your face, before your hand reached up wiping it in amusement.

“Gate close.”

[setmeatopthepyre]

Bucktommy and sharing a dessert 🩷

(@ambernotember)

I know I sent you a tidbit of something that was going to be for this prompt fill but I decided to use that for something else so here is something completely different! oops another au. went for strangers on the road from this poll though if I ever end up writing more I may add the other winner too. I've been yelling at @trombonechurchill about my desire to write something medieval-ish ever since I saw this gorgeous artwork by @chimneyz, though also very much based on my own fencing experience and desire to write homoerotic swordfighting. of which there is tragically none in this ficlet. but it's the thought that counts. gonna call this sweetmeats au just in case I decide to return to it

-

sharing a dessert [bucktommy | 620 words]

The young knight has the sleeves of his undershirt rolled up, tendons shifting in strong forearms as he pokes and prods at the coals of the fire, getting them to spread evenly.

“You’re planning to cook?” Tommy inquires, his resolution to only engage in conversation for the sake of acquiring news quickly forgotten. Sure, the man doesn’t appear to be traveling particularly light, but neither has Tommy spotted any fresh game on him that would require preparation.

Blue eyes blink up at him, contrasted by bright splashes of pink high on the man’s cheeks from the fire’s heat. It’s a very pleasing look on him. Tommy decides he won’t notice such things going forward.

He fails at that, too, when the knight smiles at him, cheeks dimpling sweetly.

“Not cook, exactly, but I have some hand pies that taste much better warmed. Would you want one?” With that, he produces a bundle from the satchel behind him and unwraps the waxed cloth, showing Tommy its contents: flaky dough brushed generously with egg wash, shining and golden and crisp despite their time packed away. Not the pies one buys at the riverside market, where the dough is just a necessary vessel for the often questionable filling. These were made with care in a home. They look much, much better than the dried provisions Tommy plans to fill his stomach with, the hard bread that he needs to moisten to be able to eat. And here he’d thought his meal would be a luxury since he had wine to wash it down with tonight.

“A kind offer, but unnecessary,” he wills himself to say. There’s no need to be indebted to this stranger if he can help it.

For his part, the knight just glances up at him a moment, then continues on, undeterred. “I have herbelades, as well as sweet pies with apple, if you rather not eat pork,” he says, tilting the wax cloth so that Tommy can better see. “I, uh, made those myself,” he adds as if embarrassed. “I learned it in my lord’s kitchens so I wouldn’t have to go without.”

“You baked these?” Tommy finds himself asking. It’s a disarmingly charming thought, this knight begging his way into some lord or inn’s kitchen to bake sweet apple pastries to eat on his travels. Tommy wonders, not for the first time, who this man’s patron is, what lord would provide for his knights to spend their free time baking in kitchens instead of inflicting their boredom on the local peasantry.

“I did,” the knight confirms. He doesn’t insist Tommy take one or even repeat the offer, but he places three hand pies on the stones by the fire: one of the herbelades, and two of the apple, the dough yellow with saffron and smelling sweetly of cinnamon and cloves and ginger. The scent makes Tommy’s mouth water, his stomach audibly interested, and the knight grins up at him from his place by the fire. “It won’t be but a moment,” he says knowingly.

“I wouldn’t want to impose,” Tommy tries, but he can hear how unconvincing he sounds. He’s always had a weakness for sweets - and for men with even sweeter smiles.

“I insist,” the knight says, and Tommy is unable to argue, is left only to wonder at this strange young knight, traveling alone with satchels laden with pastries that smell like heaven. If Tommy were the kind of man to believe in the fantastical tales the old ladies tell, he would be afraid this man was one of the fair folk come to lure him into the woods with the promise of sweet treats for eternity. Thankfully, he isn’t, and Tommy knows these woods better than anyone.

-

thank you @ambernotember <3

[neverpathia]

"I'm on a path in the woods? And at the end of the path is...a village?! "

It's you. You've reset.

so I'm doing one of those tumblr-plays-stp AU blogs, but with a little bit of a twist.

You play as the Narrator.

“ Whatever comforts you may find in these welcoming spaces, take heed and recall yourself.

There is no undoing your wrongs. There is no unjust forgiveness.

There are only amends and retributions.

This is your final chance. ”

Maybe you're here to make things right; to take responsibility; to redeem yourself. Or maybe you're here to reminisce on the past; to reinforce an agenda; to prove a point once and for all.

Or maybe you have no idea why you're here, and to be frank, you really don't.

All you know is that, for some reason, you're stuck here with eleven dunderheaded boys. You once knew them as the Voices. And you probably need to do something about them first.

elaboration and propaganda under the cut

-- -- -- -- --

here's a brief explanation of my AU but you don't have to read it.

Just know that the Long Quiet has left the Construct with the Heart of the Shifting Mound. This is the end of their story.

But it's not the end of it all.

The Voices remained behind in the Construct. Even when they sought the Princess, or even when they tried to leave it all behind and live in solitude; they always found one another. Even when they were the last thing on each others' minds, they always wound back up together. They used to be one, after all, and the cracks between them are far finer than those between the Quiet and the Mound.

So since they couldn't get away from each other, they eventually settled in the Construct and expanded the cabin into a nice little village.

But the Village is still new. It's rife with conflicts and teeming with disputes.

Still, they all try to live as best they can.

Sometimes they embark into the vast, endless Woods of the Construct. Sometimes they stay behind in the village and live in peace.

Sometimes they have to fend off pesky creatures and the more irksome Vessels. Sometimes, even tending the farms and making their trades can prove to be grueling trials.

Sometimes the Vessels stay awhile. Sometimes the Voices say goodbye.

Sometimes they celebrate. Sometimes they mourn.

And now you're here.

Some of them have accepted you. Some of them don't want to forgive you. Some of them can't forgive you.

"But you must be here for a reason. At least...I think so."

"Let's just hope everything is okay."

Once upon a time, you were the narrator of Their tale. It is now time for you to write your own story.

-- -- -- -- --

well. folks, I think I'm going to go through with it. but I'm going to need a bit of help.

1. I can't think of a name

2. ...yeah that's pretty much it

p.s. no romance between narry and the voices. however, you can play matchmaker. and you can DEFINITELY befriend the various voices and vessels- hell, that's pretty much the whole point of this thing! just hanging out and trying to make amends. I hope.

p.p.s. if the thing is badly drawn I apologise, most of the art is gonna be pretty rushed because I take forever to draw something decent.

[gliphyartfan]

The au in which hylia is teh one who sealed or cursed Y/N. After discovering this the chain decided since to side with the villain of their stories for example. Skyward sword link works with demise and so on.

Aaaah, makes more sense. But still not clear enough? (Wait did I write this Au?) most of final big bads are uh…dead? So they can’t just resurrect them all Willy Nilly.

Maybe this is a list for each individual and not the chain as a whole but I dunno ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.

Alright! Time to Wing it!

(I genuinely hope I answered this correctly 🥲🥲🥲)

But also that’s actually rather tricky if you GENUINELY think about it.

Cause yes, With Sky

Sky’s trust in Hylia is shattered when he learns she orchestrated (Y/N)’s suffering.

And he seeks out Demise, swallowing his hatred and disbelief to work alongside the Demon King.

And while working with Demise’s forces, Sky becomes hardened and more brutal.

Sky’s newfound drive may even surprise Demise, who quickly recognizes Sky’s tactical mind. Sky uses his knowledge of Hylia’s weaknesses, strategically placing Demise’s forces where they can inflict the most damage on her temples and followers.

But honestly? I doubt Demise survives, Sky

isn’t siding with Demise in spirit but probably manipulates their partnership to weaken Hylia. He gives Demise enough power to serve his plan, sowing just the right amount of discord to make Hylia vulnerable without letting Demise gain full control.

And while subtly sabotaging Hylia’s temples and weakening her mortal influence,

Sky’s primary goal is still to kill Demise, only after he’s used him to dismantle Hylia’s power. Sky plans to drive the final blow himself. (She probably escapes anyway. Much to his rage)

With Warriors

Warriors would joins Cia and Ganon, leveraging his knowledge of Hyrule’s soldiers to disrupt and weaken them.

Well, he’d play the part of hero until Ganon shows up and then just joins up with him…..or maybe…no…nah he has to wait, Cia would have spotted it before the darkness split her. (He still doesn’t like Cia tho)

Warriors knows every tactic the Hyrulean army will employ, and he’s relentless in using that to his advantage.

He becomes a spy within Hyrule’s ranks, (he can’t be a traitor if HYLIA betrayed him first. Thems the breaks) sending misinformation and sabotaging missions, all to bring Hyrule’s forces to its knees for (Y/N)’s sake. Warriors never falters, his loyalty to (Y/N) driving his every action.

Honestly Warriors pretends to remain a loyal soldier to Hylia’s cause within the Hyrulean army while secretly coordinating attacks that amplify chaos, allowing Ganon’s forces to strike where it hurts Hylia the most. He’s playing both sides.

Considering he’d make a brief trip to Skyloft, (and Nintendo never makes things clear about time periods.) I’m gonna assume each era is close enough to the heroes of the era that it wouldn’t be odd that Sky could send messages to Warriors.

He won’t hesitate to manipulate people he once considered friends if it furthers Sky’s plan to weaken Hylia, prioritizing (Y/N)’s rescue over everything else.

With Time

Time would see Ganondorf as a means to an end. He joins Ganondorf’s cause, using his knowledge of the temples and sages to disrupt Hylia’s carefully laid plans.

To Ganondorf’s forces, Time is terrifying, silent, calculated, and nearly impossible to predict. He holds a deep, simmering rage within.

And just in case anyone asks, within the mask, the Fierce Deity watches Time closely, seeing how the hero’s loyalty to his sword brothers contrasts sharply with his rebellion against Hylia. While Fierce remains bound, observing Time’s darker decisions with approval, he’d subtly align his energy with Time’s intentions, lending strength where it’s needed most. (Gotta protect his vessel ya know?)

Fierce Deity understands vengeance, perhaps better than anyone else. Even without communicating directly, Time can feel this resonance. There’s an unspoken agreement, Fierce supports Time’s defiance against Hylia’s will, seeing it as a just rebellion.

Time might notice that the power of the Fierce Deity feels especially potent when facing those aligned with Hylia or when defending his brothers. Fierce Deity’s own ancient rage fueling each strike.

While fighting beside Ganondorf, Time would have to craft a careful facade, (kinda like Sheik except he doesn’t have a magical disguise to hide his features….does he??) and considering the war of eras, he’d also be able to help Warriors with his side of things.

Ooooh the heroes that join Warriors could easily play the part of brainwashed heroes~

With Twilight

Well, bitter and heartbroken isn’t enough describe his feelings. He’s been heartbroken once by Midna. And maybe for a brief period of time, he genuinely thought (y/n) left him too.

So to find out Hylia was the one to take her away was….the limit.

So he’d strike a deal with Zant and Ganon.

But given Ganon probably still hates the hero cause of Time’s little act of slaying. So he’d side with Zant for a while.

He and Zant would create a network of darkness across Hyrule, corrupting places once sacred to Hylia I suppose? (Aw but I like Midna….)

His ferocity increases tenfold, and he finds bitter satisfaction in seeing the land Hylia cherished crumble under his hands.

He just wants his darling back.

With Wild

Well….Wild’s trust in the goddesses was already unsteady before with his own insecurities and self-doubts, but now it’s shattered, leading him to align with Calamity Ganon’s essence.

Not much going on since Ganon destroyed everything already and Flora is holding Ganon back. I mean, he’d wait until she couldn’t hold him back no more and then just switch the chaos?

He probably infiltrates the Yiga Clan, rising to a powerful position within their ranks to wreak havoc.

With Legend

Legend throws his loyalty to….i guess Yuga? (Boy he has a bunch of journeys.) seeing in him a chance to finally defy Hylia.

Or rather, he’d aid Lorule in gaining Hyrule’s Triforce. OR maybe he can’t…

…actually…maybe he just speeds up the poisoning of the land. Make it more Rulie’s era, after?

With Hyrule

Well Hyrule has always carried a subtle skepticism of authority (have you SEEN his era??) , so learning that Hylia, the goddess he once revered, is responsible for (Y/N)’s suffering would strike a chord.

This betrayal would make him question every act of loyalty and every sacrifice he made in the name of serving a higher power. He would quickly become resolute, deciding that any being capable of such cruelty doesn’t deserve his allegiance.

Hyrule’s protectiveness over (Y/N) would intensify. He would view (Y/N) not only as someone he cares for but also as someone wronged by a divine power. He’d become ruthless in his pursuit of freeing (Y/N) from Hylia’s influence and would stop at nothing, even if it meant forging dark alliances and exploring forbidden paths

To stand against Hylia and her agents, Hyrule would seek out shadow magic, using it to level the playing field against holy magic and divine forces. While he might initially be cautious, his dedication to protecting (Y/N) would outweigh his reservations.

Hyrule’s gentle spirit might begin to darken as he moves down this path. His compassion would remain, but his disillusionment would leave a lasting effect, making him wary of kindness that comes without reason and promises that seem too good to be true.

He’d become a hardened figure, mistrusting of any higher power and willing to destroy anyone who stood between him and his goal.

With Four

Four’s fractured self allows him to see all sides of Hylia’s betrayal, making him perfectly suited to side with Vaati and , Shadow.

Each color has a different way of undermining Hylia’s forces. Blue is calculating, Red is fiercely defiant, Green becomes a spy, and Violet dives into dark magic.

Together, they are a force of chaos, and their unpredictability makes them especially dangerous. So long as Vaati can guarantee (y/n)’s return and safety, he doesn’t care what he has to do.

With Wind

Wind is lured into Ganondorf’s cause, using his knowledge of the Great Sea and islands to spread rebellion among those loyal to Hylia. (Which aren’t a lot given most don’t remember Hylia in that era. But it doesn’t make it easier for him to make her out to be the devil.)

Wind adopts a reckless, defiant attitude, channeling his anger at Hylia into everything he does. He becomes powerful weapon in Ganondorf’s hands. (But remember folks, the heroes loyalty only stick to eachother and ABSOLUTELY their darling so Ganon dies if he can’t deliver on his promises!)

[kimio7]

Fics that defined my love of f1 rpf

In celebration of literally nothing actually, i bring you a fic rec list of some of my favourites!!! very condensed (100+ -> 15 not even including tumblr fics) and im kinda sad i cant put all of my favs down lol but these are like my must reads!!

pleaseeee read these if u havent already its all amazing even if you dont vibe with the ships themselves

Strollonso:

silver platter by atwater | E | 9k

Literally the first fic I've ever read and basically got me into this fandom (and ship). Theyre both so unhinged and amazing it's a very fun read. Probably the best written lance ive every read.

Make Sound by antimonyandthyme | E | 1k

Makes me so fucking insane no notes this is just amazing oh my god

I make two grand an hour by Kaytheologie | E | 3k

Literally so hot and so amazing. lance is so bitchy in this one is great. amazing writing and amazing premise, literally inspired me to sketch out something right after (might finish it at some point)

Sewis:

provenance by ecorone | M | 18K

Literally the fic that introduced and made me fall in love with sewis. it wrecked me like i still havent recovered at all. the writing itself is just, i vibe to it so much

The Numbering at Bethlehem by Kaytheologie | E | 26k

might be one of my favourite fics, ever. what a masterpiece genuinely the environment is just so immersive and lush. ive reread it a dozen time and it never gets old

Brocedes:

you're my purple candy high by nothoughtsjustvibes | M | 5k

baby's first brocedes 🥹 started my love affair with emotional destruction. ruined me when i just first read it and ruined me every time after that. The writing is so profound and laid out their tragedy bare.

the torture of small talk with someone you used to love by finedae | T | 2k

baby's first nico fic!! it also destroyed me!! i think this is the one that made me join f1br bc i was just so obsessed with the writing i needed to know what the author was like lol.

3344:

special research vessels by ecorone | M | 15k

listen i thought this ship wouldve been more popular than it is LOL or at least not as hated. regardless, i love this fic so much. I love the environment, I love the dialogue, the characterization, everything. It's just such an amazing reading experience

matchstick people by ecorone | E | 60k

if you havent noticed by now, im obsessed with this author. the prose, the characterizations, how beautifully the magical realism of it all was realized. horror as a genre is so underutilized in fanfics as a whole but when its done, its done amazingly. love love love

Others:

crude generalisations and vulgar simplifications by crescenteluce | E | 14k | Alexander Albon/George Russell

This fic is THE galex fic for me. it so funny and the writing is so witty its just fun to read. love the way the environment is constructed and it everything just feels so real. amazing

it's more than I can bear: this interminable want, turning and turning. by Anonymous | E | 2k | Fernando Alonso/George Russell

The vibes are rancid, the ships are niche, the writing is good. what more do you need? i love reading this and i love thinking about this.

Amen by sirius | M | 9k | Fernando Alonso/Lewis Hamilton

THE ferwis fic is my mind and mad me unreasonably obsessed with this ship. its so well written- like i love the characterization so much it makes me insane.

on golden sands bysionisjaune | T | 6k | Lewis Hamilton/Nico Rosberg/Sebastian Vettel

Listen, this and the ships that go sailing are both just amazingly entertaining fics. its objectively such a good read and i enjoy spending my time reading it. its just so fun!

steal the air out of my lungs (make me feel it) by nahco3 | E | 26K | Daniel Ricciardo/Max Verstappen

My favourite medical au fic!! ever!!! everything is just so well realized and the characterization is just spot on!! love everything about this fic and nothing i say can fully explain how amazing this fic is!!!

Shutter Speed byantimonyandthyme | E | 18k | Sebastian Vettel/Mark Webber

got me into photography lol. made me purchase my first actual camera. dont know what else to say its just that amazing

[ruksanada]

Harringrove pirate au

I added a snippet of the fic I started writing.

I think I'm at like chapter 9, defs need a beta reader, grammarly can only help my dyslexic ass so much xD but yeah here is a little sketch I did whilst inspired~

Read below ⬇️⬇️⬇️

“Looks like a noble’s ship,” Billy hummed eagerly, more to himself than to Max. “We’re taking it.”

Max raised an eyebrow but didn't argue. She knew the drill. They had done this enough times to make the plan muscle memory. Billy turned, his heart already pounding with the thrill of what was about to happen. They were pirates, and pirates didn’t survive by playing it safe.

Within minutes, they were alongside the noble ship. The Runaway Renegades moved silently through the water, thanks to Jane and Kali. Billy motioned to the crew, and one by one, they tossed the grappling hooks over the side of the royal vessel.

Billy climbed the ropes silently, his heart thudding in his chest. The moon barely illuminated the massive ship they now clung to, but it didn’t matter. He knew how to move unseen, like a shadow creeping through the night. His crew followed behind him, but Billy’s focus was ahead, locked on the captain’s quarters.

He slipped onto the deck, his boots landing with barely a sound. His crew scattered like phantoms, but Billy headed straight for the captain's quarters. Max and his crew could handle the others.

The door creaked as he pushed it open. Inside, the room was dimly lit by flickering candlelight, and sitting at the captain’s desk was a boy, no more than Billy’s age. But this wasn’t just any boy. He was a prince, a familiar one. The brunette was rolling his crown back and forth on the desk like it was a piece of scrap metal.

Billy’s heart skipped a beat before it quickly settled back into its cold, steady rhythm. The prince looked up from his desk, his hazel eyes locking onto his blues, surprise flashing across his face. He was beautiful, in that infuriatingly aristocratic way. Dark hair that looked like it had been fussed over, sharp jawline, and an air of someone who had never had to fight for anything in his life.

“Who the hell are you?” the prince demanded, jumping to his feet, his hand reaching for something, a sword, maybe. Too bad for him it wasn’t on his hip, it was over near the far to luxurious bed.

Billy couldn’t deny the prince had a certain... appeal. It was the fire behind his eyes. He was scared, but he wasn’t backing down.

Billy smirked, stepping forward with an easy swagger, his fingers playing with the hilt of his own blade. “What, no ‘welcome aboard’ for the new guest?”.

The brunette's eyes narrowed, but Billy saw the flicker of uncertainty in them. “This is my ship,” he said, his voice hard but a little too high.

Billy stepped forward, his grin widening, fingers still toying with the hilt of his sword. “Really, you sure about that? looks like it has my name written all over it… Maybe you’ve heard of it… Billy the Bloody ring any bells? I’ll be taking your ship now, princess.”

The prince’s eyes narrowed at the insult. “Like hell, you will.” He had most defiantly heard that name before he had seen the wanted posters, and heard the stories, his crew was notorious.

Steve tried his best to swallow his fear but the most recent news of the pirate in front of him was swirling around his head.

Princess Cunningham had been kidnapped for ransom. The pirate had got their ransom then slit her throat and threw her into the water. Or at least that’s what he had heard, there were so many rumours, all too unbelievable. World’s fastest ship that moved more silently than an owl, disappearing as though it had never been there. A crew of children that never grew up.

Whether it was true or not, the prince’s heart was pounding erratically in his chest. He was probably going to die.

Billy let out a low chuckle, his gaze dragging over the teen in a way that made it clear he wasn’t just here for the ship. “Oh, I will. And you’re going to stand there looking pretty while I do it.”

The brunette flushed at being called pretty but anger soon flashed across his face in a second. He hated being called useless he had heard it far too often from his father “I don’t know who you think you are, but-”

“I know exactly who I am.” Billy interrupted, taking another step closer, his grin growing. “The guy taking your ship. And you" his eyes scanned him up and down, "Pretty boy… you’re just gonna stand there like the helpless little princess you are.”

The prince sputtered, his hands clenched into fists. “I’ll-”

“You’ll what?” Billy cut in, now only a few feet away from the royal, his voice low and teasing. “Scream for help? Cry to daddy? I bet you’ve never had to fight for a damn thing in your life, have you?”.

Before he could finish, the prince lunged forward, his fist swinging hard toward Billy’s face. Billy barely had time to react, dodging to the side, the punch only just grazed his jaw. It was the second swing that got him, his other fist made hard contact with his face. The pain ignited something wild in Billy, and for a moment, all he felt was adrenaline. A sharp almost manic laugh left his mouth.

“Well, well, look at you. Got some fight in you after all,” Billy muttered, wiping the blood from his lip.

Without missing a beat, the brunette swung again, but Billy caught his wrist, twisting it behind his back in a single, fluid motion. The prince let out a sharp grunt of pain, but he didn’t give up. He kicked out, trying to trip Billy, but Billy was faster, shoving him down against the desk.

For a moment, Billy was draped over the prince’s back pressing him hard down onto the desk his breath against his ear, the tension between them thick and palpable. Billy’s grin was sharp, his eyes glinting with dangerous amusement.

It was surely a compromising sight “Oh princess, what is thy name? ” Billy teased his face an inch from the wonderfully flustered brunette.

His hazel eyes still burning with defiance. “It’s Prince Stephen Harrington and I’m not scared of the like of you.” Billy’s first thought was right. He knew him.

“Maybe you should be Stevie~” Billy shot back, grinding himself a little harder against Steve who he had bent over the desk. For a moment, the air felt charged between them, like a storm waiting to break. And then Steve, infuriatingly stubborn, threw his head backwards, catching Billy square in the nose with a hard crack.

Billy stumbled back, a sharp sting spreading across his face. He hadn’t expected that. The prince had some real guts.

But enough was enough.

Billy wiped at the blood trickling from his nose, his grin now replaced with something colder, darker. He drew his sword with a smooth motion, the blade glinting in the candlelight. “You’re fun, Harrington,” Billy said, his voice low and dangerous, “but we’re done here.”

Steve’s gaze flickered to the blade, his chest heaving from the fight, but he stood his ground, fists still clenched.

Billy stepped closer, his voice dropping even lower. “Unless you want your little crew to suffer, I suggest you calm down. This ship is mine now, and if you don’t hand it over... well, let's just say I’m not feeling too merciful tonight.”

Steve’s bravado faltered slightly at the mention of his crew “You can’t just take whatever you want,” he said through gritted teeth.

Billy chuckled darkly, leaning in so close Steve could feel the heat of his breath. “Watch me.”

With that, Billy sheathed his sword and turned, but not without one final glance over his shoulder. “Oh, and princess? Next time you throw a punch, plant your feet, then draw a charge”

Steve glared at him, his chest still rising and falling rapidly. Billy could feel his gaze burning into his back as he stepped out of the captain’s quarters, a smirk creeping back onto his face.

“Fine,” Steve spat. “Take the ship. But don’t think for a second I’m going to make this easy for you.”

Billy’s smile turned feral. “Oh, I don’t want it easy, princess. That wouldn’t be any fun.”

Steve stiffened at the insult. Billy was already heading for the door, his mind buzzing. This was going to be interesting.

As Billy stepped out onto the deck, he glanced back over his shoulder, catching Steve’s narrowed gaze.

This really was going to be fun.

[veliseraptor]

@stripedroseandsketchpads since you asked!!!

"this" here meaning my sudden and somewhat inexplicable desire for f!sam winchester, and two disclaimers feel necessary here:

(a) I have always been and probably always will be an inveterate samgirl

(b) this is all based on my memories of a show where I last participated in the fandom more than a decade ago and only watched the first seven and a half seasons or so.

and of course all of this is running on like. #vibes.

but basically what I think is interesting to me about this specific gender-change au is the way that it, like. feels like it gets very knotty in the context of canon.

so people who aren't me back in the mists of time wrote some interesting meta about the ways in which Sam is sort of "female coded" in the context of Supernatural, at least in early seasons; he's cast as the more emotional and in-touch with his feelings of the pair of brothers. Dean, while there are complications, gets on the face of it more of the stereotypically masculine characterization (compare, for instance, his womanizing with Sam's serial monogamy).

another layer to this has to do with the position Sam occupies as a character who frequently lacks agency in general and bodily autonomy in particular, and the potential interplay of that as an element of the character with the gender change. I also think about the way that Sam in relationship to both Dean and his father is the site of a lot of anxiety around the need to protect him, to an extent that does often end up interfering with his agency/autonomy. if Sam is not just the youngest of the family but also a girl, how does that inflect the perception of her as especially vulnerable and in need of safeguarding? how does that inflect the way that her family interacts with her ability to make choices about her own life?

and then there's Sam as the outsider/outlier, the "freak" - infected by evil from birth, destined for dark ends, etc. etc. which again gets especially interesting to me when read along gendered lines. there's a slightly different and to me very compelling valence that I think is particular to a universe where Sam is a woman - particularly when that's stacked on top of the largely male, patriarchal world of hunters in Supernatural canon. it's another layer of isolation/estrangement from her community that highlights the ways in which Sam is or has felt fundamentally different from those closest to her.

but yeah I think what interests me about this concept specifically has a lot to do with the gender politics of Supernatural as a whole (which are, uh, interesting) and the way that it is a show that is almost hyper-gendered, exaggeratedly gendered, and how a female protagonist might interact with that environment. not change it, critically - I don't want a version of this where the milieu is less sexist/fucked up about women than it is in canon. I want to know how a woman, embedded in the fucked-up-about-women world of Supernatural but positioned at the center of it, would navigate that.

the other thing I have been turning over in my head as I've been reading some fic of this, also, is "do I want Dean to also be a woman or do I want him to stay Sam's older brother" and I think I lean toward the latter because it turns some of the dynamic between them up another notch in interesting ways - the existing older/younger brother dynamic is messy enough and then you introduce gender into it, particularly with canon!Dean's gender issues, and it gets even thornier and messier in ways that are fun to think about.

as mentioned in dms I am especially fond of lesbian/bi Sam whose first serious girlfriend is Jessica (and then that goes...badly) and definitely Lucifer in my personal version of this AU needs a lady as a vessel.

anyway I'm thinking about this way too much and there's a part of me that's like "is there a real risk you're going to end up writing something for this." and while I don't think so it's not as out of the question as I'd like it to be

[everestgale]

The human voices AU is so interesting! The stranger pairs being siblings is sooo cute! If I can ask about specific characters, can I ask for heaecannons and stuff about Paranoid, please? He's my favourite of your human designs (I love his pretty hair) Thank you, and I hope you have a nice day!

I am so sorry, anon, for leaving your ask in my inbox for days and days, I am very forgetful, and every time I sit down to write my Paranoid HCs, I get distracted by 5 different things! Gr!

But! I'm finally replying now! First, thank you for your kind words, and thank you for liking my Paranoid! I don't draw him as much because he's kind of difficult for me to draw, but I do love his human design a lot <3

You know what, for the occasion, have a doodle of my human Paranoid with his slightly updated design! He's got glasses now (which he should've had this whole time), and his gloves are shorter :]

And second, just as a heads up, because human AU is so underdeveloped, everything is a subject to change! Also, if you would like to have more context on the human AU in general, it's in this post! Though, the main context you need is that all voices are humans, and they never directly experienced the events of the game (they exist as subconscious memories). Now, let's see what I have for Paranoid:

His name in the human AU is Pierre! Cold (Casper) and Hero (Hugo) also call him "Perry" as a nickname; he absolutely hates it coming from Cold (because Cold does it exclusively to annoy Paranoid), but find it kind of endearing from Hero (because shameless ParaHero).

As mentioned in the previous ask, Paranoid and Cold are adoptive siblings, with Cold as the (slightly) older sibling. Generally, their relationship is not bad, but they aren't super close either; Pierre finds his sibling too obnoxious and nonchalant, and Casper isn't helping as he's constantly looking for ways to be a nuisance and bother their brother, their deadpan expressions and general indifference to Pierre's anxious reactions only exaggerating the issue. It sounds like they hate each other, but they don't really. Stuff like that happens only when Cold is bored and wants to annoy their brother, outside of those moments, they both do still care about each other and help each other out, sometimes.

[Rest of the HCs are under the cut because it got very long!]

Also mentioned in the previous ask, Paranoid is a university student. Specifically, he is a last year, pre-med student, and so he is perpetually stressed, overworked, and anxious. Hunted (Harley) and Hero have to forcibly drag him out of his room to take breaks and eat.

Speaking of Hunted and Hero, he has the closest relationships with these two. Harley is his best friend since high school, and Hugo (eventually, long, long eventually) is his partner (and maybe, just maybe, a childhood best friend who he sort of lost touch with, before meeting again in university, ParaHero my beloved, and I'm a huge sucker for childhood friends to lovers stories-).

Since vessels are a part of the AU, he definitely has a beef with Nightmare, who probably was/is his high school/university bully. I can't say anything more specific though because vessel side of this AU exists even less than the voice side (damn you voice brainrot /lh /j). But since we're talking about Paranoid and Nightmare, I will mention that MoC does not apply to this HC. Clarity is likely going to be a special character in the AU, though I can't say anything specific since it's still very, very early ideas. But I have something just for her :]

This is something that requires more research on my part, but to go along with my bird Paranoid's static-y terrible vision, I imagine that Pierre also has a medical condition that makes his eyes appear cloudy and makes his vision very, well, cloudy and blurry. What kind of condition? Well, that's what I need to research-

Just like his bird counterpart again, Paranoid almost always wears gloves, although I'm changing it from long, elbow-length gloves to just regular wrist-length ones. They would probably be cotton gloves, and he wears them primarily because of his sensory issues. He feels very uncomfortable without them, though it's not as dire as it is with bird Paranoid (bird Paranoid will go into pure panic if he doesn't have his gloves on for 5 minutes).

On topic of clothes, he also has 0 fashion sense and wears clothes exclusively based on how comfortable they are. That's why his normal outfit is loose flowy shirt and shorts along with velcro shoes. My guy is all about comfort, and you will have to force him to dress up for an occasion /silly

Paranoid is probably one of the voices who subconsciously remembers the most about the Construct (along with Hero and maybe Contrarian), though in Paranoid's case, these subconscious memories take forms of repeating nightmares. He just has these vivid dreams, something about a Princess, something about locking her somewhere, something about endless terror and terror and terror and fear and fear and fea- Needless to say that Paranoid does not have a great sleep schedule, he likely already had insomnia, and the nightmares only exacerbate it. My poor boy is surviving off of caffeine (and Hero/Hunted duo also bugging him to sleep/rest anyway).

Kind of hard for me to tell which one between human Paranoid and bird Paranoid is coping and dealing better with their, well, paranoia and general anxiety. On one hand, Pierre didn't experience events of the game directly and wasn't subjected to Construct horrors. On the other, he is just a regular human, and his mind isn't as resilient to torments as bird Paranoid's. I think I want to say that, generally, Pierre is a less neurotic person by comparison, but he deals with crises and high stress situations far, far worse than his bird counterpart.

He uses his "Heart, lungs, liver, nerves," chant as a grounding/breathing technique. I actually do this IRL myself, so it's only fitting that human Paranoid would do so, too.

He has a very strong love/hate relationship with horror genre. I just can't decide if he loves horror movies and hates horror games, or if it's vice versa. For now, I wanna say it's the first one, I feel like Paranoid finds the certainty of horror movies weirdly comforting (like the fact that the events of the movie will always happen in the same order), as opposed to more "random"/unpredictable nature of horror games freaking him out.

Uh, there's probably more random HCs, but those are all I could think of right now. Yapper Everest strikes again, yippee! I genuinely didn't think I have that much on my human Paranoid, but here we are. Thanks for asking again!!! It was very fun to write about him <3

[kinky-cas]

i think claire and cas’s relationship is one of the absolute hardest things to translate plausibly into a modern/mundane au because of how tightly it’s tied to the specific mechanics and ethics of angel vessels.

like. at a bare minimum cas needs to 1) be at least indirectly at fault for her dad’s death + her life getting torpedoed and 2) look basically exactly like her dad but also be a stranger to her.

and the more you dig in the more complicated it gets! like okay, you can maybe solve the look alike problem by making jimmy and cas siblings or even twins. but also cas’s family generally needs to be the heaven analogue because that’s so critical to everything about his backstory and personality meanwhile jimmy needs to be Just Some Guy. and making them brothers makes jimmy suddenly an at least theoretically very significant person to cas, when part of the point is that he wasn’t someone cas cared or thought about until far too late, and so neither was claire.

and you have to somehow pull all this off without character assassinating either of them or throwing off the tone of your story. and none of that even touches on the time he briefly possessed her. it’s such a mess! but if you’re writing claire you kinda do need to come up with something because that backstory is all so critical to her character.

[shadowy-suitcase-herring-neck]

Dreams

Summary: Wind has a Nightmare and this time it's Legend's turn to comfort him. This goes well. Sort of?

Felt like writing a bit for my Child of the sea au. Legend once more has made an appearance. He'd just going to be a big player in this au aside from Wind Obviously. (my beloved blurbo <3)

I don't think I've posted a drabble for this au on Tumbler yet :^ I think I just posted the stuff directly to Ao3. Link to the series so far here Tw alluded to being thrown overboard ig. If anyone thinks anything else should be added just tell me

The unsteady sway of the boat beneath Wind's body. Somehow he knew he wasn't on Tetra's ship, or his own vessel. He wasn't sure how he knew this. he just did.

Everything seemed a little vague, but somehow something seemed wrong.He struggled against A blanket wrapped around him The pattern and color where familiar in a nostalgic way. Just a simple embroidered lobster pattern over waves. For some reason this only made his dread grow.

Something is going to happen.

he was certain of it.

Arms gently surrounded him though. There's a voice he can hear, It sounds so familiar. He looks up and is meet with the sight of sandy blond hair, various beads and trinkets braided into it. He can't see his face though. That bothers Wind…

Wind tries to speak but it sounds like his ears are full of seawater. Other sounds though seemed to fade in and out of focus. The creaking of the ship's rigging, the crash of waves, and the sound of humming.

Sometimes it was just one voice, other's it was two singing along in harmony. One time Wind looked up and the person holding him was different. her hair flowed in waves around her, red as a sunset over the ocean. But again. He couldn't seem to see her face clearly.

Everything seemed like it should be peaceful and perfect. But He knew something was wrong. He knew- why couldn't he say anything? he needed to tell the people there was something bad about to happen.

But his mouth wouldn't work.

He tried once more to get out of the blanket around him. Those same arms just stopped him and held him once more.

'It's alright Link, We'll be there soon.'

But thing's weren't alright. They where headed toward danger! why couldn't he tell them? The humming just continued. That same comforting yet unchanging tune.

Suddenly the warmth and gentle rocking of the boat seemed to disappear out from under him. He hung suspended in the cold air for a moment. The humming had stopped and he could just hear new voices. They sounded disgusted. Sirenspawn they said He tried to find the man and woman from before. He wanted them back- where had they gone-

Frigid water Flooded his senses and blocked all noise. Wind almost felt relieved at the silence. But he was still alone. No wait. he hadn't been alone- he tried to swim for the surface but he wasn't sure which way was up and which was down.

He had to get to the surface though. she needed him- She was too small she couldn't quite swim yet. Wind had been told that when he'd tried to take her swimming with him that one time.

His head broke the surface and he heard crying. Wind swam towards it and his arms wrapped around a bundle of reddish pink cloth. He held her against his chest and turned to float on his back like he'd seen the otters do with their young.

He looked around trying to spot the ship they'd just just come from. A promising shape appeared barely visible through the dark.

Wind carefully swam too it and pulled himself and his sister into the battered remains of a small boat. The mast was broken and the sail missing. But there was an empty blanket laying in a heap at the bottom of the vessel. He wrapped both of them in the fabric.

And they floated.

and floated.

and floated.

against a sea of ink. Wind couldn't see any stars. Maybe they'd all burnt out and left him to float forever in the dark. The humming was entirely gone now, no arms wrapped around him for comfort. the only noise was the sound of his little sister crying.

Mum? Dad? Where did you go? Why can't I go home?

Legend didn't particularly like watch duty. He wasn't sure anyone really did. But it did mean having some peace to one's self which was a bit hard to come by in a group such as theirs. Hero's where prone to chaos it seemed. Which frankly was a bit of a relief to Legend that he wasn't unusual among hero's in that category.

The old stories never seemed to include a hero's near universal interest in explosions and pottery abuse. When Everyone had realized that fact they'd shown a shockingly small amount of self control towards pots afterwards. Honestly that'd might have been the best day of Legend's life. The floor had been a glorious mass of broken ceramic and the odd rupee or two.

On man.

Yea that was probably the moment legend had decided he was sticking with these lunatics no matter what happened on this quest.

He let himself look at his sleeping companions fondly from where he sat looking over the camp. His smile suddenly turned to a frown as he spotted the youngest member of their group.

Wind's face was twisted into a distressed expression, he seemed to be trying to struggle out of his blanket. Legend moved over and tried to shake the younger awake. He was clearly having a nightmare.

Wind didn't seem to wake up though. In fact he began to reach for …something? Probably something there in his dream. Legend tried again to shake him awake. This time Wind woke with a start. Taking a moment to Realize he wasn't in whatever nightmare had hold of him before.

"Oh. It's jus' you," He murmured and sat up, Rubbing his eyes. Legend thought he caught sight of a few tears before they where quickly wiped away.

"Nightmare eh?" Legend asked but he was more than fairly certain he already knew the answer

Wind sniffed "Yea."

Legend felt a slight bit of deja-vu. Only the one who had the nightmare this time was Wind and He was the one on watch. He should try and comfort The sailor now right?

"You want to talk about it?" He asked.

"No." Wind stated with a tone of formality. So no talking about it then. At least not right now anyways. The sailor just sat on his beadroll and stared into the fire with an intensity that surprised Legend.

"Do you feel like trying to fall asleep again?"

Wind looked at the Vet. His expression was unreadable like he didn't know what he wanted to do. Eventually he let out a deep sigh "Yes an' No." He looked back at the dancing flames of the campfire.

Legend wasn't quite sure what to make of that. Usually it was either a too tired to care or a not in a million years response for him after a nightmare.

"It wasn't all bad…" Wind whispered so quiet Legend had to strain his ears to make out the words.

Ok… Legend sat next to the young sailor who almost immediately after legend got close enough just leaned into his side. He somewhat hesitantly wrapped him arm around Wind. The younger didn't make any move to push him away so it seemed to be the right choice.

He remembered what Wind had said that night he'd helped Legend after His own nightmare. Something about a song he'd sing after a bad dream he or his sister had that helped him fall asleep. Now Legend didn't exactly know the song. In fact he couldn't really… remember much about it…

…

Legend mentally shook himself. He didn't know that song but he could sing A song. Maybe.

If Wind wanted him too.

"So… I know a few songs, If you want I could sing one I guess," Legend could feel a slight burning on his cheeks. Was he really going to try this?

"Really?" Wind Seemed a bit surprised and looked up at him.

Legend did his best at a shrug without dislodging the Sailor. "Sure. You helped me the same way last time. It's only fair."

Wind studied him a moment before resuming his earlier position. "A song I'd be nice."

"Just so you know this doesn't mean I'm doing this often," Legend mumbled.

Wind just snorted.

Alright, now which one to choose from. How about that one song he heard.. Was it a bit too on the nose here? It was a good song.

Legend Took a deep breath and hoped he remembered all the words.

'Sleep bonnie pirate laddie while the waves they roll,'

Wind Looked up at Legend in surprise and also slight alarm? Had Legend choose badly? It was a stupid pick wasn't it- Wind wasn't event offically a pirate-

"Where'd you hear that?" Wind asked with a tone of slight accusation.

He'd messed up hadn't he- it was so Stupid- "It's just something a picked up on my travels. I can choose something else-"

"No!" Wind himself seemed a bit startled by his response. He quickly lowered his voice and glanced around at everyone who still, luckily, seemed to be asleep. "I mean- I was jus' surprised is all… I didn't expect to hear that particular song…" The unspoken 'again' made Legend falter.

Wind continued "Could you keep going? I… I like it." I miss it

Legend nodded. He didn't know exactly what had happened in relation to this song that had caused that reaction but it probably wasn't his business. Still didn't do anything to sate his curiosity. But he could continue.

'Sleep bonnie pirate laddie, ocean breezes blow.'

He looked down at the sailor again judgeing his reaction. Wind had curled into his side with the blanket wrapped around him. Eyes closed.

'Feel the ship rock to and fro, hear wind through rigging sigh,'

Wind's breath slowed and he let out a shaky breath. Was he crying?

'A gentle ocean sounds below a pirate's lullaby.'

The two sat there for the rest of legend's watch. The vet repeated the song a few times until he was certain Wind was asleep, this time peacefully. And then he sang it a few more times, just because it really was a good song, and everyone else was also asleep.

He thought back to where he had first heard the song. It was just a lullaby he'd overheard while staying at an inn near the sea. It had stuck in his head, he hadn't been able to get it out of his thoughts for the rest of that night he'd stayed there. He'd never expected anyone else in their group to know it.

It was just a random little song.

Right?

'I should really know better than to believe in coincidence by now'. Legend thought to himself.

[huis-one-man-show]

WIP#2, also known as "what-if-dick-gave-up-vigilantism-to-be-a-brother AU"

SO. Let me preface by saying, canon who? Canon is a tragedy and sibling relationships make me weep on a good day, so here I am with my wholesome/fluff/slice-of-life agenda and happy endings magic wand because holy shit, the Batfam is deficient in this area. I am also a sucker for magic, so there's going to be a magical touch to this series.

The heart of this series, the overarching theme, is relationships and hope and it starts with a primordial being, ■■ (that's what I've been calling her, yes it's ORV inspired), being brought into existence because the universe was lonely. My soul sister, let's call her A, once said to me:

“one thing I do think about (when it comes to the topic of hope) is how hope is often triggered in moments of isolation, hoping to one day not be so lonely or hoping to one day be heard, be seen, be understood – but I feel like hope is cultivated the most once within a collective, or within support, or community. Less seeking out hope but generally being more hopeful.”

I'll go into more detail about this particular line of lore eventually (let me know if you want to know more :O), but at the end of the day, ■■ was the first being to be worshipped as a symbol of hope, love and resilience. As civilisation advances, her origin is forgotten and she is reborn into various religions that all remember her differently – Guan Yin, Freyja, Durga, etc.

Dick comes from the last line of ■■ worshippers that remember what she represents (courtesy of his mother o7). As with any higher being (and being a fantasy/action sucker, sue me), per tradition the first born of each generation becomes her vessel and can wield ✨ magic ✨ ohohoho

How does this fit into everything else? Well, it's one of the deciding factors that makes Dick pick family over vigilantism.

I've kicked canon to the curb and squished down the age gaps of our lovely BatFam so that my timeline works out. Dick has 7 amazing years of being an only child before meeting Jason at the age of 14 (Jason is brought home at 12). About a year into staying with them, but prior to Ethiopia (I just shot canon point-blank in my backyard), Jason runs away from home which is the pivoting point for Dick to come to terms with what it means being Robin.

In Robin Wars, each of the Batboys were talking about what it meant to be Robin and Dick's answer, "Robin is Family" really did not help with my emotional investment into this AU. My selective reading took it, and ran away with it cackling. Along with the fact that Robin was a parent's nickname for their son, that he essentially became Robin in honour of his parents, it makes sense for Dick to prioritise his younger brother because family looks out for each other. To him, being Robin is about protecting your loved ones and showing up, and Jason needs that. It's not a hard decision to make at the end of the day.

And there you have it, the context for what birthed this entire mega AU.

It's a massive series I'm planning with three main parts and a shit ton of side adventures. The three main parts are broken up into the prologue (when it was just Alfred, Bruce and Dick), pre-canon (seeing how events change as Dick grows into being an older sibling, giving context for the main story) and the main story (the "current day" you could call it; it's a coming-of-age with heavy occultism and refusal of the call flavourings). I have also thought of what-if's for my what-if AU, I am too deep into this.

So far I've been writing the pre-canon chapters and finished writing some of the side adventures stories. I cannot stop coming up with new prompts for the series and I am just enjoying the writing process tbh haha

I think I've covered the major points of this AU. If you are curious and want to know more about this universe, feel free to ask, I am excited to share and to hear your thoughts! I am also open to prompts too B-)

p.s. I have cherry picked some events from the canon timeline to be a part of this universe. Characterisations are a mix of fanon and canon and whatever homebrew that's going on in my head ���✌🏼

(side note: recently I've been toeing the Teen Titan's line and I'm so screwed because their dynamics and friendship just resonates with the core AU theme help mE—)

[armiliadawn]

Help me, please!

I’m going to need your help deciding which story I’ll write next. I have two ideas that I’m really excited about, but I can’t choose between them. So it’s up to you! (I’ll write both, but this poll will determine which one comes first.)

Idea #1: Kid x Reader Werewolf AU. Fantasy/medieval. Probably NSFW.

In an isolated village, nestled on the edge of a mysterious forest, your life is defined by solitude and the knowledge passed down to you by your father. You are a healer, accustomed to working in silence and wandering the woods, far from prying eyes and gossip. But rumors have grown persistent: an immense and terrifying creature is said to roam, a ferocious beast that spreads fear and doubt in people's hearts. One night, under the full moon, as you venture into the forest to gather herbs, you encounter something beyond anything you could have imagined. He is gigantic, majestic, and his amber eyes seem to pierce straight into your soul. This is no ordinary wolf. He is something else—something greater, something far more dangerous.

Confronted with this fascinating and fearsome creature, your fate wavers. Amid the mysteries of the forest, whispers of hunters, and hidden truths, will you find your place, or will you be consumed by the secrets you seek to uncover?

Idea #2: Kid x Reader "Beauty and the Beast", inspired by Christophe Gans’ movie. Fairy Tale AU. Probably NSFW.

On a peaceful island, your life is shaped by the tales of sailors at the port—stories of legends and adventures that fuel your dreamy imagination. But everything changes the day a dark and ominous ship, the Victoria Punk, docks on your shores. They say it’s cursed, and its captain, a merciless "Beast," leaves destruction and terror in his wake. When your father disappears after venturing too close to this sinister vessel, you have no choice but to board it to save him. Confronted by a captain as brutal as he is enigmatic, you find yourself trapped in a world of metal and secrets. Yet behind the fury and the terrifying aura of this man, you sense deep scars. Thrown into the lair of the "Beast," will you uncover his mysteries without losing yourself?

Cast your votes, and feel free to reblog this poll - I feel like my hashtags aren’t working 😭